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Tuesday, April 28th, 2009
8:48 pm - interesting thing about live journal is...
I really enjoy reading my old LF entries. Though at times I'm not exactly sure what I was ranting/venting about, for the most part its really entertaining to kind of jump back into the past and imagine what it was like, recreating those feelings and see if it's somethinig I can still feel or connect to.

Teenage -twenteen angst is awesome.

Passionate is another good word to throw out.

In comparison to my current life, I feel much more boring than who I was. I don't know if its a sign of maturity or just growing up. Or it could just be that I'm just simply more boring and dont do as much. Which is pretty damn sad.

In general, I know I've matured since these earlier blogs... but at what cost? I ranted about not having money, needing a job, wanting a car, etc. and now I got all that. But I cant help but think I've lost something along the way. Sure there were certain experiences between then and now that has changed me, but it's kind of sad to think that I maybe much more numb now to "experience" things in general. It used to be about the little things that I enjoyed. Trivial outtings with friends and conversations that I didnt want to end. Minds racing with ideas. This was fun and entertaining stuff. And now for the most part when I'm having a conversation with someone I'm always not fully drawn into the conversation or I'd rather not talk to that person at all, growing very impatient. That was never me. But it is me. It seems decent converations can't be had anymore but with the exception of an old friend or an alcholic beverage in hand. Even then i cant help but feel it isnt as sincere as it used to be. I really dont know what im getting at if im really trying to get at anything. But i know in the next 2, 3 years ill probably read this post and comment again.

Though I've said this before, I'd like to start posting as a habit again, but i wont be suprised if i dont live up to my expectations.

Maybe this is an unpremeditated benefit of a digital live journal. to come back every now and then to check old posts. Whether it be out of boredom or habit or randomness, sifting through old entires, reflecting on the old ideas and comparing it with the ones. And by doing so you kind of find pieces of yourself. As much as we change a lot as each day passes, i cant help but also feel its easy to forget who we were, but maybe that's a good thing. I guess thats for everyone else to decide on their own.

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Tuesday, February 3rd, 2004
1:01 am - i did it toooo
Advanced Big 30 Personality Test Results
Sociability |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Gregariousness |||||||||||||||||| 58%
Assertiveness ||||||||||||||||||||| 66%
Activity Level ||||||||||||||| 46%
Excitement-Seeking ||||||||||||||||||||| 66%
Enthusiasm |||||||||||||||||| 54%
Extroversion ||||||||||||||||||||| 62%
Trust ||||||||||||||| 46%
Morality ||||||||||||||| 46%
Altruism ||||||||||||||| 50%
Cooperation ||||||||||||||| 46%
Modesty ||||||||| 30%
Sympathy |||||||||||||||||| 54%
Friendliness ||||||||||||||| 45%
Competence |||||||||||||||||| 58%
Neatness ||||||||||||||| 46%
Dutifulness ||||||||||||||| 50%
Achievement |||||||||||||||||| 58%
Self-Discipline |||||||||||||||||| 58%
Cautiousness |||||||||||| 38%
Orderliness |||||||||||||||||| 51%
Anxiety ||||||||||||||| 42%
Anger ||||||||||||||| 42%
Depression |||||||||||| 38%
Self-Consciousness |||||||||||| 38%
Impulsiveness ||||||||||||||| 42%
Vulnerability ||||||||||||||| 46%
Emotional Stability |||||||||||||||||| 59%
Imagination |||||||||||||||||||||||| 78%
Artistic Interests |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Emotionality |||||||||||||||||||||||| 74%
Adventurousness ||||||||||||||||||||| 70%
Intellect ||||||||||||||||||||| 62%
Liberalism ||||||||||||||| 50%
Openmindedness ||||||||||||||||||||| 70%
Take Free Advanced Big 30 Personality Test

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Friday, December 5th, 2003
4:02 am
two days off... its all about the smallville season 1 dvd set.

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Monday, December 1st, 2003
10:35 pm - just kidding
-X- the parade. it started at 6:45 instead of 7:45. The park closed tonight at 8:00pm.

I dont like going to the place of business unless i have to. But sometimes, its okay.

Two producers. One stone. They fetched my paper. Looks pretty damn good, trailer anyone?

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2:51 pm
now
laundry

afternoon
thighs
barbell lunges
smith machine squats
lying leg curls
leg extensions

calves
standing calf raises
seated calf raises

lowerback
hyperextensions

abdominals
hanging leg raises
hanging knee tucks
flutter kicks
incline sit-ups
bicycle crunches
side crunches

tonight
watch christmas parade

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Saturday, November 29th, 2003
11:10 pm - overtime
yesterday night

chest
barbell bench press
flat bench dumbbell flyes
Incline Dumbbell Flyes

triceps
Machine Triceps Extensions
One-Arm Dumbbell Kickbacks
Triceps Bench Dips

Abdominals
Hanging Leg Raises
Hanging Knee Tucks
Flutter Kicks
Incline Sit-Ups
Bicycle Crunches
Side Crunches

today
worked from 10-6 extended till 10pm due to rehearsals

tomorrow
work from 10a-2am due to new performers.

i love overtime pay.

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2:56 am - bruised and broken
i didnt want to go home yet. My matchbox and cigarettes make good driving companions in the dead of the night. It would probably take a few rounds to make a mile driving in my block, but that was adventure for me at the time. it became boring so i was heading towards k high by taking my old walking route which was through los molinos. Red means stop, and so i am. Green means go, and then i went. Driving less than about 10mph, i decide to call mike e to add a piano melody to one of our songs. That phone call saved my life. sure enough, red meant go for someone else driving about 60 mph. I didnt even have to break hard; it was like stopping to ask someone for driving directions. I felt like i was in bullet time for a few seconds. He didnt even seem to hiccup once or even flinch. I stayed right in the middle of the intersection for about another 3 or 4 seconds. Green means go. If i probably went any faster, this journal entry wouldnt have existed.

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Friday, November 28th, 2003
1:51 pm - thanksgiving
Shed be happier with someone else. I'm just going to close the door behind me, but I doubt it has a lock. Just knock before you come in and be respectul by stomping your feet on the mat. Thanks.

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Saturday, October 18th, 2003
6:53 pm
id really like a bedroom on a second floor, then id be inclined to leave my windows fully open for a fresh breeze to come in and not have to worry about people looking in a lit room at night.

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Thursday, August 7th, 2003
2:18 am - uncrustables...
its damn near impossible to find a store that sells 10 packs of smuckers uncrustables... ive been obessing over some uncrustables for the past two hours and still there has been no help...

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Tuesday, December 3rd, 2002
1:55 am - strike 2
His eyes upon your face
His hand upon your hand
His lips caress your skin
It’s more than I can stand
Feelings I can’t fight
You’re free to leave me
But just don’t deceive me
And please
Believe me when I say
I love you



MR - El Tango De Roxanne

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